Wednesday, 4 March 2015

IWSG (March)


                                      Many thanks as ever to Alex 

Thanks also to our co-hosts for this month Chemist Ken,Suzanne Sapseed, and Shannon Lawrence

"The task we must set for ourselves is not to feel secure, but to be able to tolerate insecurity."
German psychoanalyst Eric Fromm (1900 to 1980)  


Don't you think this is true? I stumbled across this quote a while ago and it stuck with me.

When you really think about it, what do we need/desire to make us feel totally secure? And, should all the stars align and those 'things' were to happen, would it make us feel secure for ever? I doubt it because our life's are constantly evolving and changing and therefore our insecurities are fluid as well.

Writers seem to have a never ending pot of insecurity into which to delve, it goes with the job. Criticism and rejection, however nicely worded or presented, can fuel our own destructive thoughts. But the same must be true of any creative pursuits. Writers, artists, sculptors, musicians, and many others, all create something that they hope will be enjoyed and appreciated. But the fact is the process of 'putting something out there' exposes you to comment, good and not so good.

So, insecurity is normal. It is totally acceptable to feel insecure, indeed we should expect it. If (and I know it might be a big if at times!) we can do this, then maybe we can work on the learning to tolerate it part.

Personally this month I feel insecurity knocking on the door. I've work on submission so it would be strange if I didn't have these feelings.

But ... I am working on the tolerating part. I am distracting myself with a new project and allowing myself to do things unrelated to writing. Taking a walk, spending time with family and just catching up on some long overdue chores at home. At the very least I'll be able to enjoy a clean and tidy house for a while!

I hope you are all finding ways to tolerate your insecurities this month.




36 comments:

  1. I like the idea of tolerating insecurities. I think it would be very strange if I ever felt completely secure. Things are never going to be 100% perfect. We just have to learn a way to cope with the insecurity.

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  2. You do have a knack for coming up with great quotes!
    I think all the waiting involved in submitting, editing and being published gives the insecurities a chance to creep up on you, no matter how positive you are to start with. So, learning to live with them is the only way.
    Glad you're finding plenty of ways to fill the waiting time xx

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    1. I keep on going, Helen! I do find a quote x

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  3. Insecurity is what keeps us moving, even if we don't always enjoy it. Doesn't mean I don't a break from it every now and then.

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    1. A break would be good, ken! Thanks for being a co-host this month.

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  4. I found this post strangely uplifting, Suzanne! It's great that you're managing your insecurities and finding ways to tolerate it - something I think I'm going to have to work on! Best of luck with your submission :)

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    1. Sometimes I'm a bit like a swan, Rachel! Calm on the surface, paddling like mad beneath! Thanks for visiting.

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  5. Insecurity and I have been hand in hand for a while, I don't dislike living on my own but the fact I am unwanted by my two children. does hurt and at times feel so desperate, I think of a few quotations like"Never worry what you can't do anything about" and "Don't worry about things that may never happen". and "Todays gratitude buys you tomorrows happiness." I guess things will sort themselves out but it's been like this for 16 years............are they going to change now?

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    1. I hope things get better for you soon.

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  6. Have to accept what we can't change and keep on trucking along

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  7. The tolerating part is no fun. But if we are in a place where we never feel insecure, then we aren't doing anything, right?

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    1. I guess it is about stepping into the unknown sometimes.

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  8. How true. Facing our insecurities (because they will never leave) makes sense. It's the tolerating that's tough, but I like your diversions. I went bike riding in the cool air yesterday and it was exhilarating. You gotta to do what you gotta do. Stay the course _/)

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  9. Insecurity is normal. We'll experience insecurity in every aspect of our life.

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  10. Sometimes (very rarely, almost nonexistent) I can't stand that I'm a writer. I don't like that I share my art, that I have to expose myself like that. But then, that's part of the life which, 99% of the time I absolutely LOVE. Insecurity is normal for everyone, but for artists, it's basically a requirement (if it's not - tell me the secret. Seriously). People are going to be insecure - it's just learning how to deal with it. Awesome post!

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    1. Thank you, glad you enjoyed it. I'll head on over to your blog and say hi.

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  11. Dr. Fromm knew his stuff. I couldn't agree more.

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    1. It certainly gave me a different prospective when I read it.

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  12. When we write, we're putting our innermost thoughts down on paper... for people to read! We are very brave!

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  13. Well said, Suzanne. I especially liked the 'fluid insecurities'. So true.

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  14. Insecurity goes with the job territory! I find a lot of things scary, but with writing, the desire to be published outweighs the fear and insecurity! :)

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  15. Great quote...and I agree that this is particularly relevant for writers. Our insecurities never go away...we just get better at either ignoring it or conning ourselves. :)

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  16. Great quote. We're not always at that point where we can eliminate an insecurity from our lives. So we manage it and mitigate the risk the best we can as we move forward.

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  17. Love the quote.
    Did you get the purple glasses??

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    1. I did Dixie! Will post about them next week. Ran out of time this week!

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  18. I think insecurity (and unhappiness) are natural states of being. Personally I don't "tolerate" so much as I learn to appreciate every little thing that IS good, because so much in the world isn't.

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  19. Like everyone else, I say perfect quote!!! Insecurity and Writing go hand in hand. We just need to scrape it off....

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  20. You might have a point. I hadn't thought of it like that before, but I suppose if we were to be totally secure we'd to know exactly what was going to happen and I'm not sure I do want to know.

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  21. I love that quote! To be a writer is to be insecure. I don't see how it could be otherwise (because an arrogant writer who thinks they're already at the top of their game is one who will never improve, and it's all about improving). I'm going to keep this in mind and hope that insecurity gets a bit more tolerable some days :)

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